The Joy of Hating Your Boss With Your Coworkers

If you've ever worked for someone like Miranda Priestly, you get it. Having a boss who is never impressed, holds impossibly high standards, and casually requests unpublished "Harry Potter" manuscripts (or something like it) is enough to make you rethink your entire career trajectory. But here's the thing: if you are struggling with your boss, you're rarely the only one. And when you have coworkers who feel the same as you, it creates community. It's a shared "did you just see that?" look across the break room. It's a "wait, are you reading this right now?" Slack message. It turns every unhinged email or wild meeting moment into instant group-chat material to laugh about later. And weirdly enough, the shared hate is . . . kind of fun? "Shared adversity is prime fodder for an inside joke," psychotherapist Jessica Hunt, LCSW, says. "When coworkers recognize they're in this foxhole together, it fosters trust, openness, a sense of belonging, and solid shit-talking material." Below, Hunt explains why. Experts Featured in This Article Jessica Hunt, LCSW, is a California-based psychotherapist specializing in anxiety, relationships, identity, and life transitions. Why Is Hating Your Boss With Your Coworkers So Fun? There is something inherently fun about hating your boss with your coworkers. According to Hunt, one reason for this is because having shared experiences, especially when frustrating or stressful, is prime bonding material. "It elevates the relationship with your coworker from something more formal or transactional to playful and relational, which makes going to work all the more enjoyable," Hunt says. It also makes your experience less isolating. "Knowing you're not alone creates a sense of alignment and validation that's both relieving and energizing," Hunt says. When you're not the only person who hates your boss, it can reassure you that you're not overreacting or being sensitive to situations. Plus, it adds levity to tense moments. Of course, there's a time and place for humor, but hating your boss — and sharing that resentment for them with others — can help take the edge off an overwhelming or demoralizing experience, Hunt says. "When you're spending 40-80 hours a week doing something, it's nice to have it also be a space where you can experience humor and connection," she adds. Perhaps most importantly though, occasional venting or humor is cathartic and regulating, Hunt says. "You get to name your frustration out loud and have it validated by others in the same boat," she adds. That said, chronic negativity is not healthy — especially when it starts to reinforce a sense of helplessness. "The line between healthy venting and something more corrosive is whether you leave the conversation feeling lighter or more wound up," Hunt says. "If you're rehearsing the same rant for the third time this week and feeling worse each round, the venting has tipped into rumination." So yes, having a toxic boss is not for the weak, but if there's anything we learned from "The Devil Wears Prada" and (its sequel), it's that the shared experience of surviving your boss from hell is all part of the fun. And somehow, that may make the 10:57 p.m. emails a little bit more bearable. 49367279 Taylor Andrews is the senior balance editor at Popsugar, specializing in topics relating to sex, relationships, dating, sexual health, mental health, travel, and more. With eight years of editorial experience, Taylor has a strong background in content creation and storytelling. Prior to joining PS in 2021, she worked at Cosmopolitan.